If you’re reading this, I want you to know that I see you. Menopause brings so many changes—hormonal shifts, fluctuating energy levels, and yes, for many of us, weight gain that feels impossible to shed. It’s frustrating, discouraging, and sometimes it can seem like no matter what you do, the scale just won’t budge.
But here’s the truth: it’s not just about the physical changes your body is going through. What truly holds you back from reaching your health and wellness goals often lies within—you know, that constant, critical voice that shows up in your head? I like to call it the Judge.
Let’s take a moment to understand this inner Saboteur and how it can impact your journey.
🌿 Meet the Judge: The Inner Saboteur That Holds You Back
The Judge is that voice that beats you up over every mistake, every perceived failure, and every imperfection. It makes you feel worthless, even when you know, deep down, you’re doing your best. And during menopause, when your body is already navigating hormonal changes and emotional fluctuations, that voice can feel even louder. It might be telling you things like:
• “You’ll never lose this weight.”
• “You’re failing because you can’t keep up like you used to.”
• “What’s the point? You’ve tried before, and it didn’t work.”
Does this sound familiar? The Judge focuses on everything that’s wrong, making it hard to recognize even the smallest victories. It makes you feel like you’re unworthy of success or happiness.
But here’s the thing—the Judge doesn’t work alone. It activates other Saboteurs, like the Victim or the Restless, all of which create stress, anxiety, frustration, and self-doubt. These Saboteurs thrive on negative thinking, and they keep you stuck in a cycle where nothing seems to work. They make you feel like your efforts are never enough.
🌸 The Three Faces of the Judge
The Judge shows up in three main ways:
1. Judging Yourself This is when the Judge tells you you’re not good enough. It criticizes you for every mistake and slip-up. Maybe you tried to eat healthier but had a cookie. Or maybe you didn’t make it to the gym today. The Judge tells you, “You’re not trying hard enough,” or “Why can’t you just be more disciplined?” It fuels feelings of inadequacy and leaves you doubting your ability to change.
2. Judging Others The Judge doesn’t stop at criticizing you—it also compares you to others, making everything worse. You might find yourself thinking, “Why does she have it so easy? Why does she look great and I’m still struggling?” This comparison distracts you from your own progress and traps you in a cycle of jealousy and self-criticism.
3. Judging Events or Circumstances The Judge doesn’t just criticize you and others—it also makes you feel like life itself is unfair. You might catch yourself thinking, “My body is broken. This weight gain is unfair,” or “Why can’t I lose weight like I used to?” These judgments trap you in negativity, preventing you from seeing all the progress you’ve made.
🌿 Shifting from Judgment to Action
To break free from self-doubt and the Judge.
Imagine that you have an inner guide, one that helps you move forward with clarity and intention, even when your Saboteurs are the loudest. This guide helps you stay focused and take action, even when fear, doubt, or procrastination creep in. Here’s how you can get started:
1. Set Achievable Goals – Start small with goals like a 15-minute walk or drinking more water. Celebrate each victory, no matter how small, as it builds your confidence and reinforces your ability to succeed.
2. Challenge Negative Thoughts – When the Judge whispers, “You’ll never lose this weight,” pause and reframe it. Replace self-doubt with positive affirmations like, “I’m making steady progress, and that’s enough.”
3. Practice Self-Compassion – Be gentle with yourself during this journey. Understand that change takes time, and treat yourself with the kindness you’d show a friend. Your progress, no matter the pace, is worth celebrating.
🌸 Create a Vision of Your Healthiest Self
Take a moment now to close your eyes and picture what your healthiest, happiest self looks like. Imagine yourself feeling strong, confident, and at peace with your body. Visualize yourself taking small steps each day, caring for your body and mind with love and intention.
You are worthy of that vision. You are capable of reaching your goals, no matter how long it takes. The key is to keep moving forward—even when it feels hard. You’ve got this. Every time you silence the Judge, you reinforce your worth and remind yourself of how amazing you truly are.
💖 You Are Enough, Just as You Are
Beautiful, if you’re feeling stuck, frustrated, or like you’re not enough, I want to remind you of something: You are worthy of all the love, care, and health you’re working toward.
Take a deep breath and give yourself the gift of self-compassion. You’re not defined by the weight you carry or the challenges you face. You’re defined by the love and kindness you show yourself every single day.
If you’re ready to take your next step toward embracing your worth and taking action, I’m here to support you. Together, we can make this journey one of healing, growth, and transformation. You’re not alone—let’s do this together. 🌸
Loving vibes💖✨
